Can’t sleep. Teeth grinding. Nervous. Distracted. Sideways glances. Let’s face it, you are struggling. And so is your staff. Maybe it’s the election, or the economy, COVID (again!), fires, injustice, climate change, hurricanes, social media…THE ELECTION. Or maybe it’s ALL OF IT. In short, we are currently living with a tremendous amount of uncertainty.
During these times, – it can be helpful to remind ourselves that everyone else is affected as well; we just don’t all demonstrate in the same ways how the uncertain times are impacting us. We’re all walking on pins and needles, nervous about what’s happening today and what it means for tomorrow. Nearly every leader, friend, family member, and colleague I speak with these days tells me they’re feeling it one way or another. And they’re trying to figure out how to meet this moment, both personally, and in their leadership.
Some leaders have chosen to address these times by putting a plastic smile on their faces and being supernaturally positive in their dealings with staff. They think their staff is looking to them for optimism and inspiration right now. This is the time to dig deep, they proclaim at the all-staff. Keep up this momentum. Push harder. Pretending that everything is just fine isn’t authentic leadership. It’s toxic positivity, and it will eat away at your integrity as a leader and your organization like a mold.
No, you’re going to have to do more than dig deep. If you’re going to keep your own head above water and help your staff do the same, you will need to find the right mix of strategies and tactics for your situation. There’s no easy formula, and I want to offer a few thoughts.
Reconnect to your values
In stressful situations, there is going to be a tendency to do a lot of things: a press release, an outreach program, an all staff call, etc. If you want to make sure that these actions aren’t scattershot, it’s vital to spend a little time with your core values, both personally, and as an organization. What are your core beliefs? How does those values indicate you should treat people? How do you want to operate while staying true to those values in the world? Spend some time on this. Make a list, and use this list as a starting point for everything you do. Even in uncertain times, when there is no clear path forward and no “right answer” your values will keep you anchored. For those of you who haven’t done that recently, Brene Brown has a great free resource.
Self-care
As I’ve mentioned in past posts, it’s an odd habit of humans that in times of stress we tend to jettison the habits that serve us the most: healthy eating, reduced stress, good sleep. These habits are vital, and it’s important to lean on them. It’s particularly important to avoid the things that cause you and your staff unnecessary stress and anxiety. Maybe this isn’t the time to launch an unpopular new office policy. Or launch a new strategic plan. Instead, ask yourself, what do I need in this moment? Do that. Ask your staff the same question and listen.
Today problem?
One of the first things I like to do when dealing with a stressful issue is ask myself, “Is this a today problem or a tomorrow problem?” This isn’t a way of ignoring existential issues, but rather a way of organizing your actions and your energy. What do you have to do right now, as opposed to a problem that you may or not have to face down the road? Reflect on what is important right now, rather than getting caught up what-ifs and maybes. Create a “bike rack” for tomorrow’s issues. They will be still be there.
Make space for emotions (yours and others)
Another important thing, that will help both you and your staff during these times, is to make space for their emotions. Give them the room to speak, and listen. Leaders can have a bias towards action and problem-solving—and sometimes there isn’t anything that can be done or solved in the moment. Instead just listen, and let people see you listening.
Stop the presses
Someone I know who once worked at a newspaper told me that it was a hard lesson to learn when it was the right time to abandon all the work his team had done and stop the presses for a big story. This translates to any kind of leadership, where you and your team feel the need to keep grinding on various bureaucratic and programmatic priorities, even when literally the world is coming down around you. It takes a real leader to give everyone permission to stop, set aside their to-do list and deadlines, take a breath and begin again with work that better meets the moment. That report or grant application or action plan can usually wait.
Random acts of gratitude
The other day I was in the middle of a bad run along the beach and came upon a city worker cleaning graffiti off a public restroom that literally gets hit every week. I’ve seen him do this multiple times, so I took a second and thanked him for his work. He told me that I’d made his day. And, oddly, that made me feel so much better.
Find tiny moments of joy
Getting back to the above though about self-care, it really helps during stressful times to do one tiny joyful thing for yourself each day. Leave the office in the middle of the day to go walk in the park. Eat a donut. Take your kid out for ice cream before dinner. Make your favorite special blend of coffee tea. Wake up to watch the sunrise. These kinds of things can really help you clear your head and renew the energy you need to take on difficult times.
We have all heard many times the Chinese proverb, “May we live in interesting times.” In this moment, the invitation is to accept we live in uncertain times, ground yourself in your values, your tiny joyful and grateful moments. Focus on the issues of today. And begin it again tomorrow morning, when the dew is still fresh on the grass, the birds are singing and the sunrise is just beginning to peak above the horizon. You can make it through.
